The classic Genie in the Lamp question.

If you had 3 wishes, what would they be?

So as I was sitting in my own personal Purgatory (only with no sign of entering Heaven), I got bored. Really bored. So I strung together 150 paper clips and hung them up inside the little hut. As I was connecting the paper clips I suddenly found myself humming "Friend Like Me" from Disney's Aladdin movie.

So naturally, I got to thinking about that age old question. If you had 3 wishes, what would they be?

So at first I thought about an endless supply of money. Not necessarily trillions of dollars. Maybe just the amount I have now, plus whatever I choose to earn after. Then my bank account doesn't deplete, it just stays constant.

But then I got to thinking about the ramifications of my decision. Seeing as I would basically become a money press with my account, I could cause inflation to skyrocket. I'm not losing money. I'm generating new money every time I buy something. I'd crash the whole economy and then be the only guy left who could just barely afford bread with what I had. Then buy that one loaf and cause the End of Time.

So no infinite money. Maybe enough to end my loans and set me up with some nice investments and a cool house. But not infinite money.

So I scratched money off the list. It would be nice to have, but not really worth it.

So I thought about knowledge. All the knowledge about everything there is to know in the entire world. Automobiles, airplanes, quantum physics, how it all works and comes apart and then gets together again. I could do anything with enough knowledge.

But then I thought about knowledge vs ability. For instance, I know how to do a free throw. I cannot actually score a free throw.

I know how computers run and what parts make a computer. I cannot build a computer.

I know what a balanced martial arts stance should be like. I very rarely manage a balanced stance.

So I decided that knowledge is nothing without ability. And if the genie allowed me to roll that all into one wish, then I'd totally go for it. If not, then it's still up there. And making a second wish for ability to match my knowledge wouldn't be too bad of an option.

Then I thought about super powers. Flight is redundant. Not worth one wish if that's all I can do. Especially if I can't fly very fast.

If I got the knowledge and ability wish from previously, I thought it might be cool to have superhuman athleticism. Run really fast, jump really high or far, lift heavy things, etc. I could be a wicked awesome fighting machine.

Or I could have the ability to bend reality to my will. It's a bit over the top, but it encompasses nearly every wish I've considered so far. Unfortunately I think the strain of keeping my stray thoughts from triggering this ability would be difficult to control. Plus trying to hold reality together in my head so that I don't end up contradicting things without making necessary steps to change the reality over would be very hard to do.

On the other hand, I could do anything.

I also considered other superhuman abilities. I thought about what it would be like to wish for the ability to never need food, water, or sleep. I don't know how it would affect my ability to eat and digest food, but I would hope that I could eat and drink for fun. Sleep would be a pain because if I were living alone, I'd probably be bored most nights. If I lived with someone, it might risk waking them up. Especially if that someone was my spouse.

I thought about what that would be like. Laying in bed next to someone who was trying to sleep and not being able to sleep myself. It would probably drive me stir crazy.

But the things I could accomplish with all that extra time!

So I decided that eating and sleeping were both good. Especially since I enjoy them so much.

Ultimately I decided on two wishes (or one if they could be combined). Knowledge of everything, and ability to match.

Now I have one or two wishes left. lol

Yeah. I was bored at work today.

Metal Slimes.

Our Hero finds himself walking along a riverbank in a valley. The sun is shining, there's not a cloud in the sky. The weight of his new sword feels good across his back. With companions at his back, he is ready to tackle any challenge that comes his way.

From his right shoulder, a muscular arm points a sausage of a finger. "There! Wot's that, guv?"

The others can see it, too. As our Hero shades his eyes and squints into the distance he can see something shining on the ground in the distance. As he makes his approach, a metallic teardrop shape smiles at him.

Fwoosh! The tiny droplet puckers its lips and spits a ball of searing flame at our Hero's head. He draws his sword and returns the favor, chopping downwards and landing a solid blow.

The little drop rolls backwards and hops back to its normal position.

Our Hero's allies draw weapons and take their best shot at the little monster. It dodges, rolls, or takes the blows without care. Perhaps the burly one manages to land a hit. The refined one finds his arrow striking true.

Still, the little drop stands. Smiling.

At last able to take no more, our Hero leaps high into the air, putting every ounce of his weight and muscle behind his steel. The little creature rolls back with a small ting, and lies still.

Weapons are sheathed. Sweat beads on foreheads.

Suddenly small glimmers appear all around.

Swords drawn once more, our Hero stands back to back with his allies.

"Guv, I'm sorry I bothered to point that first one out."

inspired by the video game Dragonquest VII.